Period

This blog is for Robyn Allison, which I know you will find strange once you read it.

Dear Period,

I realize that someday you will help me have babies, but I truly don't appreciate the fact that you visit me more than once a month. You have visited 8 or 9 times in the last 5 months, which is entirely unacceptable.

I am tired of you causing me to puff up and feel like I way 500 pounds.

I really would prefer not to have so many pimples.

I am becoming poor because I constantly have to purchase certain items at the store that will help contain the rush of nonsense coming out of my body.

You are lucky that I am not married right now because otherwise, I would be even more pissed off that you would be keeping me from having sex.

I'm already tired enough from school, and what do you do? You decide to wear me out to the point where I can't even keep my eyes open while watching tv.

I need a break. I can't continue this up and down rollercoaster of a relationship anymore. It's unnecessary, exhausting, and expensive.

We need counseling.

Hate,
Sarah